My dream of publishing a book by an Indie publisher, is just near. So near that I think I could touch my book.

Its been a patient four years of renaissance, where I started as a pantser, molded my writing into a plotter , and eventually ended up as a plantser. I have experienced them all.

It just feels like yesterday. I took a pen and a manuscript book, and wrote without a plan (just with the theme in my mind) or a thought (we writers are not from this world). So many characters and worlds came and were removed (it was hard). But, I kept writing, until there was a time when I started to re-jig my theme.

Many times I felt it was not good enough. Many times my inner critic said people wont like it and they wont read it. This lead to months of not writing (a single word), which was the beginning of the writer’s block. It was a traumatic period, where the creative part of my mind said you could write, while the logical part of my mind said, its bad. I was traversing between this two extremes and believe me that is bad for a writer. Either I had to say a BIG NO to writing or I had to write. But, I was taking a middle path (which sometimes might not work everywhere) and that is equally bad. I was in the depths of oblivion.

Many times I had given up writing and even started considering new trades of interest, such as, learning guitar, abstract art, online courses, even singing (LoL – because I was never a bathroom singer before) etc.

Unknowing to the chaotic melodrama played by my mind, I was somehow writing for blogs. Just to keep my subscribers reading. I wasn’t sure of what I wrote.

But, maybe, in such trying situations, I wrote my best. Poems came, followed with the influence of poetic writing with a sprinkle of my Stephen King’s way of mature writing, made me write some brilliant works in the last two years that ezines started to take notice of my works. They started publishing.

One after the other they were published, and I even went on to win the national award in the Editor’s Choice category getting a credible sixth position (I call that day a big day or the day of my awakening). This was when my sleepy eyes awoke from its slumber and I started to believe that I could, infact, write.

The confidence was back and I was at best, in my enthusiastic self.

Back from my vacation, I wasted no time and hastened the ‘Book One’ completion process.

So, where do I stand now?

Most likely this week, or, the next, I will be speaking to my publisher on initiating the process.

Its not just a dream, but, a process defined in a surreal mix of facts and fantasies.

In the end I would say to myself, Son of a Gun (no bad words intended), You did it!!